Listen, I get why biking is an attractive and sexy alternative to driving. You look cool, you can swerve in and out of traffic, and you can literally park anywhere. Except when you’re sweating bullets from your 45 minute commute and your calf muscles are burning through your epidermis from all those goddamned hills.
It’s not as rosy as Fast Company’s recent infographic, This Bike Could Save Your Life. In fact, this bike will likely either kill or maim you.
Your success at turning to cycling as your primary mode of transportation is dependent on a lot of factors.
1. Urban planning and rent. Yeah, bike all you want if you are blessed enough to have income that let’s you bike around with a block of gruyere and bottle of Malbec in your woven little basket on your one speeder. Even better if you live in an area that doesn’t have a lot of hills, large bike lanes, and roads that give priority to pedestrians and bikers. Otherwise, if you are in the financial situation that forces you to take public transit, you probably live in the suburbs and it would be easier to just take the bus instead of showing up to work smelling like a wad of sweaty socks.
2. Your anxiety levels. You’re a tiny little speck in the big wide world of SUVs. Want to make a left turn? I think I just had a panic attack. Not mention if you have to bike across freeway entrances. Those are fun. Biking requires you to pay MORE attention than driving does and to be even MORE defensive. Any little thing could cause you die. Which brings us to…
3. You don’t crash. Sure, you lose 13 lbs in a year. Sure you get more muscley. If you don’t crash and break every bone in your body. This goes back to urban planning. I don’t think I’ve met a single cyclist that hasn’t crashed into an open car door or some other thing that can just come rolling out of the sidewalks. I’ve done a forward flip my bike twice just from trying to jump a curb and not seeing a medium sized rock while biking at night. Biking is dangerous. You have to be trained to do it. Unlike walking or riding the bus, it takes expertise to be able to make left turns, avoid crashing into pedestrians and cars alike, ride up hills, ride down hills, etc.
If I were you, I’d just take the bus and walk to work or school. It’s safer, more efficient, and you won’t reek of corn chips and wet dog.
Also – get off the fracking sidewalk cyclists! I’m walking here!
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